Preplanning Archives • Page 2 of 3 • Blog | Found and Sons Funeral Chapels & Cremation Service

Empowering Those at the End of Their Lives Through Preplanning

People can be a little unsettled by a discussion about death, but it’s so important that end-of-life discussions happen within all Culpeper and Fredericksburg families, as well as between a family or individual and a trusted funeral home.

From our experience at Found and Sons, making prearrangements can be particularly beneficial, mentally and emotionally for those facing a terminal illness or those who are nearing the end of life naturally.

If that describes you, or you just like to plan for the future, here are four ways preplanning can help you process the idea of death and even find comfort in the midst of such a difficult time:

1.) A chance to reflect

At Found and Sons, we believe every person is unique, and their funeral service should reflect that. As a result, we offer a numb

er of ways families and individuals can express their personality through personalization. Balloon releases or memory tables are just a couple of the options.

Look through your closets and drawers – what are some of your favorite things? Your fishing pole? A book or Bible? Maybe it’s the afghan your grandmother knitted for you or your first rocking chair. We can incorporate all of these special items into your farewell.

2.) A chance to say goodbye

When you think about it, funeral services are actually more for the living than for the person who is deceased. They can bring a tremendous amount of peace.

We’re all used to hearing loved ones eulogize the person who has been lost. But wouldn’t it be special if you were able to write letters, or even record video messages, for friends and family that could be read, or played, at your own service? Preplanning gives you the power to do that.

3.) A chance for one last gift of love

At Found and Sons, we have heard time and again from families about how much it meant to them that their parent or grandparent preplanned their funeral. It removes a tremendous amount of pressure when arrangements are already in place when a death occurs. Your family is then free to focus on remembering you and figuring out what life looks like now that you’re gone. This can also minimize disputes between family members.

4.) A chance to communicate who you were

Perhaps you have very particular ideas about cremation v. burial or a specific vision for your service. When you plan ahead, you are in charge of deciding what aspects of the funeral are most important. You get to ensure your remains are treated in a way that matches up to your values and beliefs. You can also determine whether or not your service will have a religious thread or perhaps be more secular. The main thing is that it’s up to you, and you’re in the driver’s seat.

What aspects of preplanning would be the most comforting to you? Share with us in the comments below.

How to Talk to Your Parents about Preplanning

Here at Found and Sons Funeral Chapels & Cremation Service, we’ve noticed in recent years that more and more people in Culpeper and Fredericksburg are planning their own funeral ahead of time. And some choose to do it rather early in life – many as soon as they retire. These people realize that not only are they taking the opportunity to express their own desires about their farewell, they’re removing a huge burden from their family. When the time comes, there will be no guessing and no arguments about what they would have wanted. Everything will be right there, in black and white.

For those who do preplan, it’s easy for them to see the benefits and to want to encourage others to do the same – especially their own parents. Many people encourage their aging parents to take care of practical items like a will or an advanced health directive. But making funeral prearrangements can be just as important and should be included in those end-of-life discussions.

But it can be hard to broach the topic with your mom or dad. What’s the best way to approach the subject without causing offense or making them uncomfortable? We have several tips we can offer:

Begin by acknowledging it’s not an easy topic to talk about. No one wants to think about their own death, and you certainly don’t want to dwell on how you will feel when your parents are gone.
Point out that death is a part of life, and we simply don’t know when the moment will come.
Explain why this will be helpful to you and your family. Express your desire to follow their wishes when it comes to their remembrance and final disposition.
Recognize the truth about your health or your parent’s health. If your mother or father is in poor health, the reasons to plan are even more urgent.
If you’ve preplanned yourself, tell them some of the reasons you made that choice. Most likely, the love for your family and desire to make your death easier for them will be at the top of the list.
Make sure your parents know they don’t have to tell you every aspect of their plan right now. They can meet privately with our caring team here at Found and Sons, or complete their arrangements online whenever and wherever they’re most comfortable.
On the other hand, you might offer to help them make their plans.
Reassure them of your love and their importance in your life. Tell them you hope you won’t need these plans for many years to come, but explain that this will bring you peace of mind, knowing things will be handled the way they would have wished. It’s truly a gift of love.

At Found and Sons, we are here to help you and your whole family with funeral prearrangements. We can even provide you with an example of how this conversation might go for you. Reach out to us anytime, or you can find more information or begin the planning process right here on our online home.

5 Things You Should Do When a Loved One Dies

The First 5 Things You Should Do When a Loved One Dies

If someone you love has just passed away, your head is probably spinning. Your life will never be the same, but there are some very practical things you need to handle. Here are the top five things you need to do after losing someone close to you.

1.) Report the death.

If your loved one passes away in a doctor’s office, nursing home, hospital, or in hospice care, a doctor will be able to do this for you. If they die at home here in Culpeper or Fredericksburg, you will need to call 911. While state laws vary, in Virginia, a paramedic cannot pronounce a death, so they will need to transport your friend or family member to a hospital.

2.) Make Found and Sons Funeral Chapels & Cremation Service your next call.

We will help you complete the certificate of death and arrange for the transportation of your loved one here to the funeral home. If your friend or family member passed away while traveling, we will bring them home in a professional manner for the lowest possible cost.

There are a number of other decisions you will need to make at this moment. Our caring, experienced staff will walk you through all of your options and determine the kind of service and final disposition that most closely matches your loved one’s wishes.

3.) Notify others.

Take care to tell the people in your inner circle first. It is best practice to refrain from sharing any news on social media until you are sure all family and close friends have been notified. Be sure to call your loved one’s employer and make arrangements immediately for the care of any children or pets left behind.

You may want to enlist the help of other family members and friends to help with notifications, especially if you are the primary person responsible for making the funeral arrangements.

4.) Plan the funeral.

There are a number of considerations for you to make when planning a funeral. Unless your loved one chose to preplan, you’ll need to decide between traditional burial and cremation, as well as their final disposition, and all the other details related to their service.

At Found and Sons, we will work closely with you to design a service that will capture your friend or family member’s personality and bring you healing. Think about the ways you want to infuse the service or visitation with your loved one’s personality. Fortunately, our staff is not only experienced with managing all of these details, they also know firsthand what a difficult process this is for you. Their care and concern will help making these decisions as easy as they can be.

5.) Begin down a road towards healing.

Grief is a long journey, and for some, it never ends. In the midst of managing the practical details that must be attended to after a loved one’s passing, don’t neglect to take the time you need to practice self-care. As much as possible, try to get at least 7-8 hours of sleep at night. Drink plenty of water, eat healthy foods, and try to fit in a bit of exercise each day – even if it’s simply taking a walk around the block. Spend time with people who lovingly support you, and don’t be afraid to reach out for help.

Above all, know that when you plan with Found and Sons, you are never alone. We are always here to connect you with resources that will help you in your grief. And our commitment to help you and your family continues long after the funeral service is over.

Do you have any tips or advice to share with others about what to do after a loss? If so, please offer them in the comment section below.

Funeral Service Options; What is Best for my Loved One?

Four Types of Funeral Ceremonies

Planning a funeral involves many personal decisions concerning how you or your loved one wish to be laid to rest. We often hear questions from the Culpeper and Fredericksburg families we serve about the major differences between the funeral options we offer and what will fit best for their wishes, traditions, preferences, and budget. The team at Found and Sons Funeral Chapels & Cremation Service is always ready with the answers to those questions, and we can walk you through each decision. So, what are some of the most common questions we hear when it comes time to plan a service? Here are a few:

What is a graveside service?

A graveside service is a service held at the site of burial. It is typically a brief service where family and friends can say their final goodbyes. In most cases, the casket or urn is present. Friends and family gather at the site, a eulogy is delivered, and the service is concluded with a committal and a prayer said over the grave. The term committal refers to the body of the deceased being entrusted to the ground. Graveside services are most often held following a funeral service.

What is a funeral service?

At a funeral service the casketed remains are present, and the service is typically held soon after death occurs. Generally, the funeral service is held in a church setting or funeral h

ome, but services may also be held in the home or a place that holds special meaning. During the service, clergy, family,

and friends may choose to speak about the deceased and the life that was lived. Commemorating the loved one is also an important part of the funeral service. Memory tables, photo boards, tribute videos, special music, and personal clothing

can be used to communicate the unique personality of the loved one in a dignified way.

What is a memorial service?

A memorial service is a service where there are no casketed remains, but in some cases, an urn may be present. Memorial services are usually held in the funeral home. Because the body of the loved one is not present, a memorial service does not need to be held within several days of the death and can be delayed to meet the needs of the family. Like a funeral service, a memorial service presents many opportunities to commemorate the loved one through the use of personalization options, flowers, or vehicles.

What is scattering?

Scattering refers to a meaningful act of disposing the cremated remains in such a way that it can represent a permanent oneness with an important place. Scattering in a river, lake, at sea, over mountains, farms, and even golf courses are not uncommon – provided a permit can be secured and that local and state laws are followed. Found and Sons can help you coordinate the scattering and advise you of any local ordinances prohibiting scattering. Many cemeteries offer “scattering gardens” with the added benefit of memorialization. A scattering urn is especially designed to hold the cremated remains until the scattering ceremony, or it can be used as a memento or keepsake afterwards. Be sure to consult your clergy as some religions will permit cremation but not allow scattering.

Whether you are planning for immediate need now or preplanning for the future, know that we are here for you 24 hours a day to answer your questions. If you do not find your answers here or on our website, you can always reach out to us for the help and answers you need.

The Many Ways to Personalize a Loved One’s Farewell.

The Many Ways to Personalize a Loved One’s Farewell

For many of the families we serve in Culpeper and Fredericksburg and surrounding communities, a memento of a loved one can be incredibly comforting in the days and months following a death. With many memorial items to choose from at Found and Sons, you are sure to find something that represents your loved one.

For friends and family that had a loved one who served in the military, you may want to purchase a flag display frame. The display frame encases the folded flag given to you by the branch of service your loved one served in and gives you a unique way to honor your loved one and to preserve the flag. The experienced staff at Found and Sons will be able to craft the most honorable farewell for your veteran friend or family member.

A video tribute is a great way to enhance a service and also provides a way for future generations to relate to the life lived. Picture images, music, and dialogue can bring the story to life and serve as a remembrance for future generations.

One unique way to keep and share cremated remains is to transform them into a jewelry keepsake. For example, you can have a ring made featuring a diamond-like stone made from the cremated remains. Another treasured jewelry keepsake would be a locket that has two compartments, one for a strand of hair from your deceased loved one and the other for a photo.

Some families who choose cremation opt for a more dramatic option. For example, there is a company who will put a portion of your loved one’s cremated remains on board a commercial or scientific satellite to send the departed into space. Another company mixes cremated remains into an artificial reef to be placed in the ocean to provide a home for sea creatures.

When it comes time to plan a farewell for your loved one, the compassionate and knowledgeable staff at Found and Sons will help you create a service that honors their memory and pays tribute to their culture, values, hobbies and accompishments.

If you choose to make your own prearrangements with Found and Sons, these are decisions you can make for yourself. From top to bottom, you can craft your own service and choose the memorialization items that are right for you. Reach out to us any time to learn about preplanning as well as all of the memorial options and personalization aspects we can offer you and your family.